"If only. Those must be the two saddest words in the world." - Mercedes Lackey
I met my neighbor across the street for the 1st time tonight. She moved in a week after us. I know it's really horrible that I hadn't gone over to meet her before now, but tonight I finally did. I had thought about going over to meet her many times before but the house is up on a hill and it seemed so formal to walk over and introduce myself. I can be really shy sometimes. I think the problem is that I have been so self- absorbed since we arrived, it's pathetic. I was pregnant, moving, putting a kid in school, new baby, husband gone all the time, etc. Anyway, (I get distracted) the reason I am upset about this is b/c I think I really would have been friends with her and she is moving on Monday. What kind of sick joke is that? I can't believe it. And even WORSE is that she just moved up here from New South Wales a year ago and hasn't really made any friends and convinced her husband to move back b/c she was miserable. Here I am across the street from her, also new and lonely. It's just crazy. Life is weird. She invited us over tomorrow but we have a baptism then said "What about Sunday?" and I said we have church. Then, so it didn't seem like I was avoiding her or anything, I suggested Sunday evening. So we are going over for "coffee" (as people say here though it doesn't always mean coffee), even though she is leaving the next day. If it wasn't bad enough, her son is 5 years old and goes to the same school as Austin. Unbelievable. I have seen him outside a few times but he looked like he was about 8, but I guess he is just big for his age. The thing you must realize is that people here keep their garages shut all the time. So they drive up, open the garage, go in and close it. There really isn't a lot of passing on the street. And their yard is in the back so they don't play out front. I know I still should have been a good neighbor and gone over before now, but let's just drop it. I failed. I even said to her "I feel like I failed you". As we talked Austin and her son played like they had known each other for years, riding bikes and even wrestling in the grass. I came back into the house and felt such a horrible, empty feeling like "Look what you've been missing out on and it's your own fault". It was weird how we connected so quickly and chatted in the driveway for a good 30 minutes talking about our husbands' work, kids, moving, etc. One of the worst things I can ever feel is regret. I hate it when I don't buy something on sale then later wish I had bought it. When I don't bring a jacket and I am cold. When I choose the pasta and it's horrible and think, "I should have gotten the salad". Regret is no fun. If you are willing to share, what kind of regrets do you have in your life? Do you hate regret like I do or do you believe that you have no regrets in life and everything happens for a reason.
7 comments:
oh it happens sometimes at least you did get a chance to talk to them....it is funny here we finally make talking friends with a neighboor only to find out they are leaving soon or the next week or so....
That's so sad Robyn, for both of you really. I guess the lesson here is to follow your inclinations and inspirations eh? That sucks.
Yes, I should have followed by inclination but there always seemed to be a reason why I couldn't go right then... you know that thing called procrastination? Yeah, I am good at it.
Oh man. I'm sorry. Convince her to stay! :-)
Here's a regret. I regret not putting a pass along card in my purse the other day. The missionaries happen to have left one on our doorstep. Then I went to the preschool and met a mom who said they were just randomly going to join the church affiliated with the preschool b/c they need a church to join. I told her being a part of the church was definitely good for kids and that we gained so much from having our kids be a part of our church which we were devoutly devoted to - and said we were LDS. It was a perfect opportunity to do more though, and I'm not very prepared! Regret.
I suppose regret gives us motivation to change, eh?
Okay, I came back here and it will let me comment more than 300 characters. That's so weird. Anyway, Rob, I am so very glad that you DID go over, look at the great lesson you have learned from this. You will never pass up the chance again to welcome and get to know a new neighbor, will you? I'm so sorry she is moving. You can stay in touch with her and maybe they'll be back?????
Don't be so hard on yourself! At least you finally did go over and introduce yourself. That is so sad that she is moving, though. But, like your mom said, maybe this is just a learning experience.
As far as regrets, the only big one I can think of right now is the fact that I lived here in PA for almost 5 years before I finally decided that it wasn't THAT bad of a place to live. I have been trying really hard to look at the positive aspects of living here, instead of the negative. I feel like I wasted those 5 years just waiting for the next plane ride to Utah instead of going out there, getting outside of my shell, and making a life for myself. It hasn't happened overnight, but it is getting better.
That is a crazy story and i'm sorry you did meet her earlier. I can see myself do this same thing. Perhaps i can learn from you.
I think regret sucks a lot, but I read something the other day that has given me hope since i dread it so...think of regret as an opportunity to change or be better. Now next time you will most likely do something different.
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